Better Beings® Founder Michelle Zellner on New Year’s Resolutions and Lasting Change

Many people make health and fitness-related New Year’s resolutions, such as losing weight, getting more sleep, or eating healthier. However, a vast majority of these fail – with around 80% losing motivation by mid-February. For most people, “New Year, New Me” ends once the novelty of the new year fades, and they often slip back into their old habits.

Michelle Zellner, founder of Better Beings®, personal trainer, and holistic wellbeing expert of 25 years, shares that she has faced that same conundrum in the past. At the start of the year, she would often promise to improve her diet or exercise more, but the changes rarely lasted. 

“I rarely saw success until I took ownership and recognized that all I'm in control of is myself,” she says. “I can control what I think, feel, say, and do, but I can't control other people's thoughts, feelings, words, or actions. If there's a certain outcome that I want, I have to do certain things to get it. I also have to figure out how to set myself up for success. It's a long process, and nobody likes that. Everyone wants instant results, with little to no effort. But that's not how reality works.”

Michelle, who is also a keynote speaker, podcast host, and author of two books, says she is not opposed to New Year’s resolutions. In fact, the new year can be a psychological fresh start that motivates people to take action. However, she says people shouldn’t confine themselves to making a start on changes in January, when they may not be ready. For example, they can do it in March to coincide with spring, on their birthdays, or after a major life transition. 

As the new year approaches and social circles publicize their goals and resolutions, some people feel pressure to get on board. Even if they're not really into it, or not ready to make changes, they feel like they're supposed to because everyone else is doing it. This halfhearted mindset can prevent them from becoming successful. 

While it may sound strange for someone like her, a fitness professional and former competitive gymnast, Michelle says that she doesn’t concentrate much on goals. Rather, she places more importance on intentions. 

“Many are making statements, promising themselves a certain outcome. When that goal isn’t reached, disappointment and feelings of failure set in. After going down that path too many times myself, I realized a new approach was necessary. I shifted my focus to my intentions. Each day, I think about how I spend my time, money, and energy, and I make a conscious choice to act in a way that will help me become a healthy, happy, and thriving human being.”

According to Michelle, the cumulative effect of the choices you make is what will have the greatest impact on the outcome. Aligning behaviors with your goals and values will lead you to the life you desire. This mindset helps her get out of the all-or-nothing dichotomy that a goal or resolution creates in people's minds. By being more conscious of the process rather than fixating on an outcome, people can also avoid the negative feelings and self-loathing associated with missing a target.

“Anytime you label yourself as a failure, it infects your sense of identity and self-worth,” she says. “If you see yourself as a failure, you're going to stop trying, and you might even be discouraged from doing things you're normally good at because your self-confidence has been eroded. This is why so many people hate making New Year's resolutions – they think they're just going to fail anyway. I used to say that, too. It really came down to me understanding that I didn't fail, in reality, I didn’t create strategies for success.”

Michelle says that being unable to achieve a goal should be taken as a learning opportunity. Whenever that happens, she reflects on the reasons why she didn’t succeed, and it often stems from not laying the correct foundation. Other times, it’s caused by taking the wrong approach, which she then modifies to succeed next time.

In 2020, Michelle and Better Beings® launched an online learning resource, YOU Revolution YOUniversity, which contains numerous self-paced courses in topics such as weight loss, nutrition, and stress management. By being equipped with the correct information, learners are more likely to achieve their health and fitness goals, leading to a more full and fulfilling life.

“In my more than 25 years as a personal trainer and wellness professional, I’ve been fortunate to encounter different types of people and learn from them, and I’ve also embarked on a journey of self-improvement,” Michelle says. “I believe there are no shortcuts to success. Rather, the road is full of conscious decisions we must make to become better human beings physically, mentally, and emotionally.”